64 Golf Jokes That Will Hit The Spot

64 Golf Jokes That Will Hit The Spot
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Want to better your golf game? How about sharing some fun golf jokes as you make your way around the course. There are many fun golf jokes that poke fun at the game.

Many times, you will find golfers hitting the links. While it may be all about trying to tee off and play the perfect round, that doesn’t mean that you can’t enjoy some humor at the same time too. 

These golf jokes are suitable for both kids and families and offers plenty of funny laughter. Have a good laugh with them. 

Funny Golf Jokes For A Round Of Laughs

Funny Golf Jokes For A Round Of Laughs

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1. What did the dentist say to the golfer?
“You have a hole in one.”

2.When is a bad golfer like a pizza?
When they both slices.

3. What are three ways to improve your golf game?
Take lessons, practice constantly or start cheating.

4. What do golfers do on their days off?
Putter around.

5. What do you call a wizard that can turn himself into a golf club?
Harry Putter.

6. Where can you find 100 doctors all at the same place on any given day?
A golf course.

7. Why do golf announcers whisper?
Because they don’t want to wake up the people watching.

8. Why did Tarzan spend so much time on the golf course?
He was perfecting his swing!

9. Did you hear about the golfer who shot one under today.
He shot one under a tree, one under a bush and one under the water.

10. How many golfers does it take to change a lightbulb?

11. What’s the difference between a golfer and a fisherman?
When a golfer lies he doesn’t have to bring anything home to prove it.

12. Did you hear about the man who played in the low 80s.
If it got any hotter than that, he won’t play.

13. Why didn’t the golfer say anything before he hit the ball off the tee?
He was at a loss fore words.

14. Why do golfers prefer a cart to a caddy?
Because a cart cannot count, criticize, or laugh.

15. What should NASA do if it wants to find water on Mars?
Send a golfer there to hit a golf ball.

16. Why was Cinderella such a terrible golfer?
Her coach was a pumpkin.

17. Why don’t golfers ever eat pie?
Just in case they get a slice.

18. What’s the difference between golf and native tribes beating the ground with clubs?

19. Why did the golfer bring a spare set of socks to the course?
In case he got a hole in one.

20. What do you call a really friendly golfer?
A social putterfly.

More Funny Golf Jokes

More Funny Golf Jokes

We hope that you are enjoying these funny golf jokes. We have even more golf jokes that will tickle your funny bone. So get ready to tee up and hit it off to some humor and laughter with these funny golf jokes and puns.

21. What did the man who wanted to play golf on election day do?
He made sure to cast an absent-tee-ballot.

22. What is the greatest handicap for some golfers?
The ability to add correctly.

23. What do you call a monkey who wins the golf tournament?
The chimpion!

24. Did you hear about the dwarf who was good at putting and chipping?
His short game is at a different level.

25. Did you hear about the scratch golfer?
After each shot, he scratched his head and wondered where the ball went.

26. Golfer: I would move heaven and earth to get a birdie today.
Caddie: Try heaven. You’ve already moved most of the earth today.

27. Why do golf pros tell you to keep your head down during lessons?
So you can’t see them laughing.

28. When is a bad golfer like a tired kangaroo?
When he is out of bounds.

29. What’s the easiest shot in golf?
Your fourth putt.

30. What did Obi Wan say to Luke Skywalker before they played a round of golf together?
May the fores be with you Luke.

31. How do golfers like their bread in the morning?
Puttered and toasted.

32. What is a golfer’s favorite dance move?
The Bogey woogie.

33. What are the primary components of a golfer’s diet?
A lot of greens and water.

34. Who is the best person to play golf with?
Someone who always plays a little bit worse than you do.

35. Golfer: “You’ve got to be the worst caddy in the world.”
Caddy: “I don’t think so sir. That would be too much of a coincidence.”

36. How are golf balls like eggs?
They’re both white, sold by the dozen, and a week later you have to go out and buy more.

37.Why did the man choose to play golf?
Because he was too out of shape to play other sports.

38. What are a golfer’s favorite flowers?
Fore-Get Me Nots

39. What is a golfer’s worst nightmare?
The Bogeyman.

40. Where can you find golfers on a Saturday night?

41. Where do ghouls and ghosts play their golf?
On a golf corpse.

42.What is the best wood in most golfer’s bags?
The pencil.

43.Why did the golfer have to change his socks?
Because he had a hole in one.

44. What’s the fastest way to take five strokes off your game?
An eraser.

45. Why did the golfer spend so much time in the office getting his work done?
Because he was puttering around.

46. What did the poor golfer get on his last hole?

47. What is a golfer’s favorite bird?
Any birdie they can find.

48. Did you hear about the two guys that met on the golf course?
It was the beginning of a beautiful friend-chip.

49. Why did the golfer stop playing after having a beer?
Because he didn’t want to drink and drive.

50. What is a golfer’s favorite number?

51. What is a golfer’s favorite hole?

52. What is a golfer’s favorite type of apparrel?
A Tee-shirt. 

53. What is a golfer’s favorite color?

Golf Knock Knock Jokes

Golf Knock Knock Jokes

54. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Wendy who?
Wendy ball retriever needs a new grip, you should give up golf.

55. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Dozen who?
Dozen anyone repair their divots anymore?

56. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Harvey who?
Harvey going to take 6 hours for this round – take your shot!

57. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Noah who?
Noah golf pro who can fix your swing?

58. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Wanda who?
Wanda how deep your ball is in the lake.

59. Knock, knock.
Who’s there? Canoe.
Canoe who?
Canoe hit one straight this time?

60. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Annie who?
Annie one know how many branches your golf ball hit as it entered the woods?

61. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Boo. Boo who?
I’d cry, too, if I played golf like you.

62. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Amy who?
Amy for the fairway – not the woods.

63. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Tahiti who?
Tahiti hole in one, you need to hit the golf ball straight.

64. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Andy who?
Andy to have a water golf ball retriever for the round with you!

Ready for more Jokes?

Did you enjoy these anteater jokes? If you did, we think that you will also enjoy these other animal puns and jokes like these dog jokes and cat jokes. If you are looking for even more funny animal jokes, we think these bear jokesturtle jokes and frog jokes will hit the spot – the funny spot that is.

Or if food jokes are more your thing, we also have hilarious pizza jokes and cheesy cheese jokes too. Or, you may also enjoy these beer jokes.

We also have fun and challenging riddles for kids that we think you will enjoy! Have a great time laughing away with all these jokes!

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