Funny pumpkin jokes are great fillers over Thanksgiving and in the fall. They can provide plenty of joy and laughter, especially at Halloween when all the jack o lanterns are lit. We’ve got a whole patch of pumpkin jokes that are so gourd that you will fall over with laughter.
Ready to spice up your life with laughter? Let’s sink straight into these hilarious pumpkin jokes and puns.
Funny Pumpkin Jokes for Everyone
1. What did the orange pumpkin say to the green pumpkin?
You look a little sick.
2. What do you call a chubby jack o lantern?
A plumpkin.
3. How was the jack o lantern able to win the science competition?
A light suddenly went on in his head.
4. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Pumpkin spice.
Pumpkin spice who?
Time to pumpkin spice up the night!
5. What did the pumpkin say when he got a shock?
Oh my gourdness.
6. What is a pumpkin’s favorite snack at the movies?
Pulp Corn.
7. What’s orange and goes choo-choo?
A Pumpkin in Train-ing.
8. Why are gourds afraid of the dark?
Because they are scared of things that go pumpkin the night.
9. What’s orange and faster than a speeding bullet?
Super Pumpkin.
10. What did the pumpkin say when he was asked how he was feeling?
I’m feeling vine, thank you for asking.
11. What did the gourd say to its friends when it was ready to paint the town red?
Let’s get this party pumpkin!
12. What did the pumpkin say when he saw his beautiful girlfriend?
Hey gourd-geous.
13. Which fairytale character did the pumpkin run away from?
Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother!
14. What day of the week do pumpkins dread the most?
Squash-urday!
15. Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Ice cream.
Ice cream who?
Ice scream every time I see a scary pumpkin!
16. What is a pumpkin’s favorite racket sport?
Squash.
17. What vegetable does a pumpkin transform into when an elephant stands on it?
Squash.
18. Why are jack o lanterns so smart?
Because a candle makes them bright.
19. Why was the jack o lantern so forgetful?
Because he was empty-headed.
20. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Pie.
Pie who?
Pie really love you.
21. What did the coach tell the pumpkins before the start of the big game?
Gourd big or go home.
22. Who helps the little pumpkins cross the road at school?
The Crossing Gourd.
23. What did the pumpkin say to the pie baker?
Please use apples instead.
24. What did the ill pumpkin say to the doctor?
I don’t feel so gourd.
25. What do you get when you drop a pumpkin?
Squash.
More Funny Pumpkin Jokes and Puns
26. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite book genre?
Pulp fiction.
27. What do you call an athletic pumpkin that plays a lot of sport?
A jock o lantern!
28. Why are jack o lanterns name as such?
Because Jill rolled down the hill!
29. Why do jack o lanterns perform so badly in school?
Because they have had all their brains scooped out.
30. Why did the pumpkin turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing.
31. What did the pumpkin say to the jack o lantern?
Got a light?
32. What do you call a pumpkin is able to slam dunk a basketball?
Michael Gourdan.
33. What did the pumpkin say at the end of Halloween?
Good-pie everyone.
34. What did the gardener say when all of his squashes went missing?
Something pumpkin is going on here.
35. Why did the pumpkin cross the road?
It didn’t. Pumpkins don’t have legs.
If you like anti jokes, check out our collection of anti jokes here.
36. What did the pumpkin say to the carver?
Cut it out.
37. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Pumpkin.
Pumpkin who?
Things that go pumpkin the night!
38. What do you call the leader of all pumpkins?
The Pumpking
39. What do adventurous pumpkins do for fun?
They go bungee gourd jumping.
40. Which English pop singer is most popular during the autumn and fall season?
Pumpkin Spice.
41. Why do pumpkins sit on people’s porches?
Because they have no hands to knock on the door.
42. What kind of animal loves pumpkins?
Orange-atans.
43. What’s the best thing to put into a pumpkin pie?
Your teeth.
44. What do you get if you divide a pumpkin’s circumference by its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi.
45. What did the pumpkin pie say after a huge meal?
That was filling!
46. Why was the jack o lantern afraid to cross the road?
Because it had no guts!
47. What do you call a pumpkin that works at the beach?
A life gourd.
48. What is black, white, orange and waddles?
A penguin carrying a pumpkin.
49. What is brown, green orange and waddles?
A mandarin duck carrying a pumpkin.
50. What did the pumpkin say to the cucumber when he saw the pumpkin carver?
Oh my Gourd!
Even More Pumpkin Jokes
51. When is a pumpkin not a pumpkin?
When you drop it. It becomes squash.
52. Where does a pumpkin preach?
From the pulp-it.
53. What is carved pumpkin’s favorite holiday?
Hollow-een.
54. What do surfers say on Halloween?
Gourd vibes only, bro.
55. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Jack.
Jack who?
Jack o lantern!
56. Why are pumpkins so orange?
Because they would look strange in blue.
57. Where do pumpkins hold important meetings?
The gourdroom.
58. What did one pumpkin say to the pumpkin who asked where the patch was?
Oh my gourd, a talking pumpkin!
59. What does a pirate jack o lantern wear?
A pumpkin patch.
60. Who comes to the field when a pumpkin is sick?
Patch Adams.
61. How does a pumpkin listen to Halloween music?
On vine-yl.
62. What’s a pumpkin’s favorite Western movie?
The Gourd, The Bad, and The Ugly.
63. What did one jack o lantern say to the other?
Happy Hollowing!
64. When is an orange not an orange?
When it’s a pumpkin!
65. What did the girl pumpkin tell her boyfriend?
Don’t gourd breaking my heart.
66. What’s the problem with eating too much pumpkin pie in the fall?
You will get autumn’y ache.
67. What kind of romance do pumpkins enjoy?
A mushy romance.
68. How are pumpkins in autumn like cats?
You will find them by the door when you get home.
69. Why was Cinderella not very good at tennis?
Because her coach was a pumpkin.
70. Why did the pumpkin take a detour?
To avoid a seedy part of town.
71. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad it’s almost Halloween?
72. Why did the princess fall in love with the chef making pumpkin pie?
Because beauty was in the pie of the beholder
73. What do you call a gourd that hasn’t been to the big city before?
A country pumpkin.
74. What did the gourd say to motivate his fellow gourds at the big game?
Let’s give them pumpkin to talk about.
75. Why did the pumpkin feel happy?
Because life was gourd.
76. What did the pumpkin counsellor tell the nervous pumpkin?
We have nothing but gourd intentions.
77. What do you call a pumpkin that tells bad jokes?
A pun-kin.
If you liked these pumpkin jokes, we think that you will also appreciate these autumn jokes too.
