Who doesn’t love a good science joke? They can add a great deal of elemental humor to any situation and have people cracking a smile.
These funny science jokes are sure to get a reaction. Whether you are telling them at your science class, or just sharing them with other science geeks, we are sure that you will enjoy these science puns and jokes.
Funny Science Jokes To Get You in Your Element
1. How do scientists freshen their breath?
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2. Why did the scientist hang up periodic table posters around his laboratory?
It made him feel like he was in his element.
3. Did you hear about the science teacher that moonlighted as a DJ?
He was called DJ Enzyme because he was always breaking it down!
4. Did you hear that they’ve discovered a new element “Ah”?
It is the element of surprise.
5. Why did the chicken cross the road?
Albert Einstein: The chicken did not cross the road. The road crossed the chicken.
6. Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon?
The food is great but it has no atmosphere.
7. What did the senior scientist working on the project say to the junior scientist?
If you’re not part of the solution—you’re part of the precipitate.
8. Why didn’t the skeleton go to the gala ball?
Because he has no-body to go with!
9. What should you do when no one laughs at your science jokes?
Keep trying until you get a reaction.
10. What do protons and cheer leaders have in common?
They both stay constantly positive!
11. What do you call a clown that has been arrested an put in jail?
12. Do you want to hear a joke about nitrogen oxide?
13. Why didn’t the skeleton dare to cross the road?
Because it did not have the guts.
14. What is a chemist’s favorite carnival ride?
The Ferrous Wheel.
15. Student: Teacher, teacher, what is research?
Teacher: Research is what you are doing, when you don’t know what you are doing!
16. When is an astronomer’s favorite time to freshen up?
When there is a meteor shower.
17. What type of music do planets dance to?
18. What do you call the lights on a lunar rover?
19. What do you call stars that wear glasses?
20. What sound does a sub-atomic duck make?
21. What is a tornado’s favorite party game?
22. Why do you find scientists in a bar?
Because according to science, alcohol is a solution.
23. Why did the chicken cross the road?
Blaise Pascal: Because the chicken felt pressure on the original side of the road. However, when it arrived on the other side it still felt the same pressure.
24. What do you call an acid with a bad attitude?
25. Why did the scientist dismantle his doorbell?
He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
26. How do you throw a party in space?
27. Why was the proton is not speaking to the other proton?
Because he was a mad atom!
28. What is a rocks favorite cereal for breakfast?
29. What happened to the scientist who took the dieting advice to “eat light”?
He became a black hole.
30. What did the infectious disease say when the bartender refused him service?
You are not a very good host.
31. What do computers like to eat?
32. What did the helpless T cell say when it was faced with an infection?
Is there antibody out there?
33. What song do chemists sing during the holidays?
Oh Chemist-TREE, oh Chemist-TREE!
34. What did the duck say to his graduate physics class?
“Quark, quark, quark!”
35. What are the main elements of a sense of humor?
Sulfur, Argon, Calcium, and Samarium. They are also known as SArCaSm.
36. How does a nucleus communicate with the ribosomes?
With the cellphone.
37. How do deaf mathematicians communicate?
Using sine language.
38. Why couldn’t the astronaut focus on his work?
Because he kept spacing out.
39. Why couldn’t the astronaut book a room on the moon?
Because it was full!
40. What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?
One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.
41. Why did the microbiologist travel to 50 different countries and learned to speak ten languages?
Because he was a man of many cultures.
42. What is the least interesting element?
43. A piece of ice fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
“Bunsen my flame! I melt every time I see you”, said the ice.
Bunsen burner replied the ice, “It is only a phase you are going through.”
44. When is the moon broke?
When it is down to its last quarter.
45. How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?
He was shocked!
46. Why is gold is the best element?
Because it’s AU-some.
47. Where did light end up after it committed a crime?
48. Did you hear about the scientist who makes horrible science puns?
He does so periodically!
49. Why did the white bear dissolve in water?
Because it was polar.
50. What did Sherlock say when he discovered the periodic table?
Elemental, my dear Watson.
More Funny Science Jokes & Puns
Enjoying these science jokes and puns? We’ve got even more to keep you experimenting with ways to deliver them to get a good laugh.
51. What happened when carbon and hydrogen went on a date?
They really bonded!
52. What do you call a 3.14 m long snake?
53. What did the hungry planet say to the other planet?
I could use a light snack!
54. Did you hear about the date that oxygen had with potassium?
It went OK!
55. What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean?
Nothing. It just waved.
56. What type of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?
57. How did the scientist cut the sea in half?
With a see saw!
58. What happened when the meteorologist weighed the rainbows
He found them to be “Pretty Light”.
59. Did you hear about the Silver Surfer and Iron Man teaming up?
They make great Alloys.
60. What did the other elements about hydrogen?
What a loner!
61. Why is electricity the perfect student?
Because it conducts itself so well.
62. What do you call it when a biologist takes a photo of himself?
63. Did you hear the new theory on inertia?
It doesn’t seem to be gaining momentum.
64. What happened after six sodium atoms walked into a bar?
65. What trait do scientists who study the sun have?
A flare for research.
66. What kind of tree did the scientist hold in his hand?
A palm tree.
67. What do you call a science joke that is based on cobalt, radon, and yttrium?
68. Why did the science lab blow up?
Because oxidants happen!
69. Why did the amoeba cross the road?
Because it was time to split.
70. Do you want to hear a joke about sodium?
71. What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorus walked into his bar?
72. What do you get when a prince farts?
A noble gas.
73. When the astronomy department found out their professor had been passed over for the Nobel prize, they decided to give him a constellation prize.
74. Why did the army use acid as part of its attack strategy?
To neutralize the enemy’s base!
75. How come two scientists could see each other but could never meet?
Because they were in a parallel universe.
76. Why can’t you trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
77. Did you hear about the cost of the space program?
It is truly astronomical!
78. What do you do with a sick chemist?
If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you barium.
79. If H2O is the formula for water, then what is the formula for ice?
80. Did you hear about the scientist who was reading a book on helium?
He couldn’t put it down.
81. What did the sandstone say to the geologist?
Don’t take me for granite!
82. What did one tectonic plate say after bumping into the other?
Sorry, my fault!
83. What do you call a test tube that has been to university?
A graduated cylinder!
84. What did the receiver say to the radio wave?
“Ouch! That megahertz.”
85. A photon checks into a hotel and the receptionist asked if he needs any help with his luggage.
He replied, “No, I’m traveling light.”
86. Why is biology such a unique science?
Because it is the only science where multiplication is the same thing as division.
87. Why did the scientists on the space station look happy when they are in space?
Because there is no gravity to drag them down!
88. What do you call an accountant for the biology department?
89. What kinds of books do planets usually like to read?
90. What happened to the scientist who got cooled down to absolute zero?
He’s 0K now.
91. What did the stamen say to the pistil?
I like your style!
92. Why did the spider buy a computer?
Because it wanted to browse the web.
93. What do you call the ringleader of a biology gang?
94. Why did the scientist dislike air resistance?
Because it was a real drag.
95. Did you hear that biologists have discovered that legs are hereditary?
They run in your jeans!
96. What do you call a short biologist?
97. Why did the scientist like renewable energy?
Because he was a big fan.
98. Did you hear about Einstein developing a theory about space?
It is about time!
99. What did the science book say to the math book? You have got problems!
100. Why is it so hard for the scientist to wake up in the morning?
That’s because of Newton’s First Law – A body at rest tends to stay at rest.
Even More Science Jokes for All Occasions
There isn’t any formula to a good science joke. All it takes is a dash of humor and wit to get the good times rolling. Takes the jokes out of the beaker and get them boiling over with fun and laughter.
101. What gas never cries?
102. What did the biologist wear to impress his date?
103. Biologists have just found the gene for shyness.
It was hiding behind two other genes.
104. Did you hear about the neutron who was arrested?
He was released without charge.
105. What fruit contains Barium and double Sodium?
106. Why did the scientist enjoy working at the lab night?
Because the Nitrates are better than the day rates.
107. Did you hear about the latest sale on protons and eletron?
If you buy one proton and one electron, you can get a proton free of charge!
108. What did the positive charge say to the negative charge after their date?
We have potential!
109. Why did Mickey Mouse go to space?
To bring back Pluto!
110. Which type of science books are the hardest to get through?
Books on friction.
111. What did is a nuclear physicist’s favorite snack?
112. Why was the scientist fascinated by water in gas form?
Because it mist-ified him.
113. What happens if you tell too many chemistry puns?
Everyone ends up sulfuring.
114. What did the scientist say when he found two isotopes of Helium?
115. Why did the biologist and a physicist stop dating.
Because there was just no chemistry.
116. What’s the best science?
Geology. It rocks.
117. Why don’t scientists like talking about mitosis?
Because it is a divisive topic.
118. How do you know when you have told a funny chemistry joke?
When you get a good reaction.
119. What do solids, liquids and gases have in common?
They all matter.
120. Why is quantum mechanics the “original hipster?”
Because it described the universe before it was cool.
121. Why were oxygen, hydrogen, and carbon wearing suits and ties?
They were a formyl group.
122. When is an astronaut’s favorite moment to eat?
123. Why didn’t the sun go to graduate school?
Because it already had a million degrees!
124. Where did the lightning bolt go to propose to his girlfriend?
125. What did one chemist say to the chemist whose lab smelled like eggs?
Sorry for your sulfering.
126. Why are chemists excellent at solving problems?
Because they have all the solutions.
127. Why did the acid go to the gym?
To become a buffer solution.
128. Why did the firefly get bad grades at science?
Because it wasn’t very bright.
129. Did you hear that oxygen and magnesium got together?
130. A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a beer.
The bartender replies, “For you, no charge.”
131. How do we know Saturn was married more than once?
Because it has many rings!
132. What did the volcano say to his girlfriend?
I lava you.
133. What did the Earth say to the other planets?
You guys have no life!
134. How do you stop an astronaut’s baby from crying?
135. What did one cell tell his sister cell when she stepped on his toe?
Watch where you’re stepping. That’s mitosis!
136. Why don’t magnets have mates?
Because they are polar opposites.
137. Where did the chemist have his lunch?
On a periodic table.
138. What did the thermometer tell the graduated cylinder?
You may have graduated, but I have more degrees.
139. What’s a pirate’s favorite element?
140. Two blood cells met and fell in love.
Unfortunately, it was all in vein.
141. What did one ion say to another?
I’ve got my ion you.
142. What is an astronaut’s favorite key on the keyboard?
The space bar.
143. Why did the germ cross the microscope?
To get to the other slide!
144. What does blood say when it’s trying to be optimistic?
145. What was the name of the clever Electricity Detective?
146. What type of a dog do scientists own?
147. Why did the science teacher take his class to the top of the mountain?
To show them their potential.
148. What do scientist tell bad jokes?
Because all the good ones argon.
149. What happened when Ohm broke the law and was arrested?
150. Einstein, Newton and Pascal decide to play hide and seek. Einstein is “it”. He closes his eyesa and counts to 10, then opens his eyes.
Pascal is nowhere to be seen.
Newton is sitting right in front of Einstein, with a piece of chalk in his hand. He’s sitting in a box drawn on the ground, a meter to a side.
Einstein says “Newton, you’re terrible, I’ve found you!”
Newton says “No no, Einstein. You’ve found one Newton per square meter. You’ve found Pascal!”