Hands up if you’re a parent facing screentime battles with your child. Screentime is part and parcel of today’s childhood. The reliance of screens is unprecedented with the advancement of technology, busier schedules and the accessibility of devices like mobile phones, tablets and more.
Ministry of Health has also provided guidelines regarding recommended screentime from babies to adolescents. Babies below the age of 18 months should not be having screentime, children 18 months to 6 years of age should use less than 1 hour of screentime outside of school while children 6 to 12 year old should limit screen use to less than 2 hours a day.
Sounds tough? As parents, we understand how challenging it is to avoid the reliance on screentime.
We speak to Cindy from @ourmindfulpod, a Certified Parent Educator trained in Satir Therapy and Social Work to find out more on how we can help manage our children’s screentime at home.
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Tips from @ourmindfulpod on Children’s Screentime
How do you manage screentime as a parent with 3 young children?
To be really honest – this is so difficult – especially with 3 children of differing needs! I always say screen time is not the enemy, but unmanaged screen time can be a challenge. Our approach at home is rooted in balance, connection, and intentionality.
We treat screens like any other tool — they can add value or they can become a distraction, depending on how they’re used. In our house, we set boundaries around when and where screens are used, and we try to prioritize screen time that’s either creative, educational, or shared together. That might look like watching a family movie (we do movie nights on Fridays), doing a dance game together, or using a learning app (e.g. Koobits, Touch-typing games).
My older children get a little more screen time than my youngest because of their age and school needs. This “extra screen time” is slotted in when my youngest is in childcare or when she is napping.
That being said, I’m also a big believer in flexibility and giving oneself grace. Some days, screens help me take a breather — and I do that without guilt. The goal is not perfection; it is creating a family culture where screens have their place, but they do not replace connection, play, or rest.
I always advocate using evidence-based guidelines as a helpful starting point. Personally, I refer to resources like the Singapore Health Promotion Board’s guide for screen use, because it’s grounded in research and provides age-appropriate recommendations. Dr Shimi Kang‘s book, The Tech Solution, is also a good guide for parents to understand why setting clear boundaries around screen use is helpful for a child’s growth in the long term.
Ultimately, every family is different. I view guidelines as signposts — they help me stay informed about what’s developmentally appropriate, but I also weigh them against the realities of my home, my children’s temperaments, and our family rhythms.
That is what I encourage the parents I work with to do as well — to approach screen time decisions with both wisdom and flexibility. Use trusted guidelines to stay informed, stay very vigilant of the types of content your child is consuming, but give yourself permission to adapt based on your family’s unique needs, values, and season of life.
Some parents might think: I was raised on a “TV diet”, I didn’t turn out bad. So what’s the big fuss about screentime? What are your thoughts?
I completely understand that because I spent so much time in front of the TV when I was younger. I also have fond childhood memories of TV time because TV time in my home was family time!
Today, it is no longer just TV, It is 24/7 access when screen time is unmanaged — from on-demand videos to endless scrolling on social media and personalised algorithms. The “TV” we face now is designed to capture attention and keep us engaged. As an adult, even I struggle to put my phone down sometimes! Now imagine what it’s like for a young child whose prefrontal cortex — the part of the brain responsible for self-control and impulse regulation — is still developing. Expecting them to manage screen use on their own is a really big ask.
So yes, many of us grew up with a steady diet of TV — but our kids are growing up in a very different digital environment. And when we know better, we can do better — not from a place of guilt or fear, but from a place of wisdom and leadership.Our role as parents is to create supportive boundaries while teaching our kids the skills they’ll need to manage technology well as they grow.
How can parents transition away from using the screen to engage their child?
First, I want to highlight that it is completely normal that screens have become the ‘go-to’ for many parents. Screens work because they meet real needs — they capture attention, create calm, and give parents a breather.
So when we talk about transitioning away from screens, it’s really important to shift the mindset from just ‘removing’ screens to replacing them with something that meets that same need — whether it’s connection, play, movement, or silence.
For younger children especially, we need to expect that transitions will take time — because screens offer instant gratification, and their developing brains are wired to want that. We can transition by planning ahead: create screen-free pockets in the day, have activities that encourages creativity (free doodle, free play, they all work).
And most importantly — stay connected. Often, what children are really craving is not just stimulation but relationship. A playful invitation, a cuddle, or sitting down beside them with a simple toy (or a notebook to draw freely!) can go a long way in bridging that gap between screen time and real-world engagement.
One 11-year-old boy that I have worked with presented with heavy screen use (almost 24/7) at onset; and when sufficient rapport has been built, he shared his loneliness at home, and how TV games gave him the connection that he deeply craved. Now, he enjoys board games and jigsaw puzzles, and he can hold conversations in school without provoking an argument!
The goal is not to create a screen-free home overnight — it’s to build small, sustainable habits that help children find joy and calm beyond the screen. A gentle note to expect tears and protests in the beginning, but press on and meet the pushback with love and understanding.
When I see challenging behaviours around screen time — like meltdowns, whining, or resistance — I always remind parents: it’s rarely just about the screen. The behaviour is usually telling us something deeper — unmet needs, big emotions, or difficulty with transitions.
Screens are incredibly regulating for kids — they offer predictability, stimulation, and instant gratification. So when we take them away without supporting the child’s emotional experience, it is very normal to see protests and cries.
My advice is to pause and get curious: What’s underneath this behaviour? Are they tired? Overstimulated? Hungry? Needing connection?
Then, support the transition with empathy and clear boundaries. For example, parents may say, ‘I know it is hard to turn off the iPad because it is so fun and your brain loves it! But it is time for a break. Let’s go outside and play together for a few minutes/ let’s grab something yummy and eat together during snack time.”
If the child refuses to let go of the device, we may reaffirm the boundary by offering a helping hand, “I know it is hard to turn off the TV. Let’s have another 5 minutes (you decide the duration) for you to conclude and I will be turning the computer off after this.”
Over time, we want to build skills with our children — emotional regulation, boredom tolerance, and the ability to shift from screen time to other activities. That takes practice, patience, and a lot of co-regulation from us as parents.
Ultimately, managing screen time well is not just about controlling devices — it’s about building connection, understanding behaviour, and equipping kids with skills for life beyond the screen.
What are your favourite activities as a family?
We enjoy nature play (free play = I can chill too), travelling, silly conversations, art/craft and of course, movie nights!
Thank you Cindy for the sharing and encouragement to fellow parents. Indeed, we ought to connect with our children more and grow together as a family rather than on individual screens.
For more on Cindy’s sharing, head to @ourmindfulpod ‘s IG.
